Supporting Your Child Through Co-Regulation: The Foundation for Emotional Growth
By MAC Midwest
When raising a child with autism or other developmental needs, one of the biggest challenges families face is helping their child learn how to regulate emotions. Meltdowns, anxiety, frustration, and sensory overload are common experiences for many children on the autism spectrum. But there’s a powerful tool parents and caregivers can use to support their child: co-regulation.
At MAC Midwest, we see co-regulation as one of the building blocks of emotional development. Whether your child is receiving compassionate ABA therapy, speech therapy, occupational therapy, or psychotherapy, co-regulation often plays a role in how we help kids build confidence, independence, and resilience.
What is Co-Regulation?
Co-regulation is the process of a trusted adult helping a child manage their emotions in real time. Rather than expecting a child to calm themselves down on their own, co-regulation allows the adult to provide emotional support, modeling, and stability. Over time, this helps children develop the ability to self-regulate.
For many children with autism, learning to self-regulate can take extra time and support. Sensory sensitivities, communication differences, and difficulty recognizing emotions can all make regulation more challenging. Co-regulation offers a safe, supportive space where children feel seen and understood as they work through difficult feelings.
How Does Co-Regulation Work?
At its core, co-regulation is a relationship-based process. You are the steady, calming presence your child can lean on. Some examples of co-regulation strategies include:
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Staying calm yourself. Your calm energy can help de-escalate your child’s distress.
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Using a soft, reassuring voice. Tone and volume matter. Speaking gently can signal safety.
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Naming emotions. “I see you’re feeling frustrated right now. That’s okay. I’m here to help.”
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Providing physical comfort. For some children, a hug, hand on the shoulder, or sitting nearby provides reassurance (always respecting your child’s sensory needs and preferences).
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Breathing together. Modeling slow, deep breaths can help your child mirror your calm breathing.
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Using visuals or tools. Some children benefit from visual cues, sensory objects, or emotion charts to help process what they’re feeling.
Co-regulation doesn’t eliminate tough moments. Instead, it teaches your child that when emotions feel overwhelming, they are not alone. Over time, this builds trust, safety, and emotional literacy.
Why Co-Regulation is Especially Important for Children with Autism
Every child develops emotional regulation skills at their own pace, but for children on the autism spectrum, emotional regulation often requires intentional teaching and support.
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Many autistic children experience heightened sensory input that can lead to emotional overload.
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Transitions, unexpected changes, or unfamiliar situations may trigger anxiety or frustration.
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Some children may struggle to identify or express emotions using words.
Through co-regulation, parents and therapists can help children learn what emotions feel like, how to recognize them, and eventually, how to manage them independently. It becomes a partnership, not a test of willpower.
At MAC Midwest, our approach to autism therapy incorporates co-regulation across many of our services, including:
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Compassionate ABA Therapy: We follow a trauma-informed, child-centered approach that meets learners where they are.
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Occupational Therapy: Helping children build sensory tolerance and coping strategies.
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Speech Therapy: Supporting emotional communication through words, visuals, or alternative communication methods.
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Psychotherapy: Building emotional understanding, resilience, and healthy coping tools.
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Family Skills Training: Empowering parents and caregivers with practical tools for co-regulation at home.
You Don’t Have to Do It Alone
If you feel like you’ve tried everything and your child still struggles with big emotions, you’re not failing as a parent. Emotional regulation is a skill that takes time, practice, and often professional support.
MAC Midwest provides a full range of autism therapy and mental health services to support children and families across Minnesota, Iowa, and Wisconsin. Whether your child is starting early intervention or you’re seeking outpatient psychotherapy for emotional regulation, we’re here to help you navigate this journey.
Get Started with MAC Midwest
We don’t treat a diagnosis; we treat individuals. Our team meets your child right where they are and builds a personalized care plan to support your family’s needs.
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Serving children ages 18 months to 21 years
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Diagnostic evaluations for autism and co-occurring conditions
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Compassionate ABA, speech, occupational, and feeding therapies
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Outpatient psychotherapy and family support services
If you’re ready to take the next step or simply want to learn more, contact us today. Our team is here to answer your questions and help you find the right path forward.
